Thursday, November 03, 2005

Why me?

*He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has - Epictetus

How many of us have asked this question? Whenever we get hurt, when we feel low and many times when we lose out on something, if not you, atleast I have had this question lingering in my mind "Why me?!" ... There was a similiar situation, I had again lost out on something important, I had been hurt once again, once again my ego took a beating, and I felt I deserve more than this, and as many a times before, I sat down and prayed, asking HIM, the Almighty, the same ol' question "Why me?!", and this time he gave me an answer.. or rather showed me the answer.

Why is it only me?
I sit in a corner and think.
Why is it only me?
In search of a just answer I blink.

I look around to find everyone the same,
I do no different, then why only my name?
I too play fair, you too do cheat at the game
At the end, why only me is to blame?
I always did try my best, in vain,
For in the end, again, I did fail.
From where I am, I can clearly see,
Everyone's on track, only I derail.

Kneeling down to GOD, I cry,
"Why do only I suffer? Why only me?", I sigh.
Cursing my life, in which i had no pride,
"Dear God, the reason for living has died".

"Thank you God!" another voice I heard,
I looked up to see an old man beside.
Frail and weak, with a smile he murmured,
"Thank you God, I feel satisfied."

After his prayers, I went up to him,
Curious about his reason for gratitude.
I learnt that today he managed to sell some fruit,
For two days, his children were without food.
His only earning, helped him buy some bread,
Happy he was, for his children and wife ate.
I realised he was blind, for he started groping his hand,
It was for his crutches, which he needed to stand.

I looked at myself, and felt ashamed
I have everything, that he has lost.
He is all grateful, for a small meal,
And Im complaining on a trivial deal.

With tears of remorse, I saw him leave,
Limping but with a smile on,
I wanted to stop and help him in some way
Before I could, he was gone.

This episode reminded me of an old saying,
"I was crying for shoes till I saw a man with no legs."
I sat there whole night praying,
Thanking HIM for things Ive got,
Rather than grieving for those I have not.

- - - Look at your friends who are less fortunate and be thankful, rather than looking at your friends wealthier and better which fuels desire and grievance.

Friday, October 07, 2005

Memoirs of the Mountain Trek.

*I beleive I can fly, I beleive I can touch the sky - R. Kelly (Song of the day)

Atlast, it happened, the long awaited trip, unplanned and undecided till the last minute. The prolonged wait was worth the enjoyment and fun.

It all started some months back, when I came up with an idea of trekking, instead of just a normal outing.After a lot of deciding which weekend is the most feasible, I almost gave up the idea, as someone or the other had some important work on the planned day. A lot of postponing and last week Pavi messaged me "Lets make a one day trekking trip this saturday". This message instilled some encouragement in me.


Friday,September 30, 2005 :

I called up Harish and asked him if he is ok with saturday, he was all ready as usual and also sent a group SMS expecting more people to join. I called Div soon after, and my excitement knew no bounds to hear that she is looking forward to the trip more than anyone of us. Thats 4 up. I then dialled Vinay's cell, it wouldnt want to get picked up, I guess, but we (all 4 of us) kept trying to get in touch with Vinny. Pavi told me she would contact Karma, Krithika and anyone else she can get hold of. I asked Div to check out some cool places that are good for trekking.

Called Girish(Dot - the workaholic), he was busy working at first, but surprisingly responded and was more than ready for it, after all he's the most adventurous and experienced in these sort of trips, and I asked him to tug his girlfriend along. So the count reached 6. Harish called back saying Mercy and Venki would join too. Count - 8. Vinay still not reachable. Damn We havent decided the place. Asked the experienced Dot, and he suggested mekedaatu. Since the count was confirmed at 8, or 9 if we do get through to Vinay, I booked a Sumo.

Minutes later, Divi dear called up to inform that due to the cyclonic rain, Mekedaatu is not a safe place. Harish a.k.a Plumpy wanted to drop the idea, reasoning that it would be raining everywhere. Hmmm since me and giving up dont go together, I started hunting to find some suitable places to trek. I got many, but the one that looked safest to me was Manchinbelle Dam, 15 kms from The Big Banyan tree,off Mysore road, and 60 from Bangalore.

Saturday October 1, 2005 :

The day dawned to a clouded morning, but my eyes wanted sleep, for they remained open from yesterday afternoon. I work in night shifts, so had to report to office, though had avery bad day at office (thats another story), the excitement of the trek kept me from losing my energy. Girish and Anu (his girlfriend), too worked all night.

The Sumo cab, we booked, came direct to my office, and I took it home as I had to freshen up a little, I called others to make sure they woke up on time. Girish then came up with a suggestion to try mountain trekking in Sivaganga. He had already been there and described it as a huge rocky mountain, with temples, and we had to walk or rather climb the mountain. Sounds interesting ?? Thats how it did to me. I called the others to let them know the change in plans, Div and Pavi were more than happy, as they wanted the same. Harish, wanted to go to some newly opened amusement park, "Wonder la"!!! - Overruled !.

I reached home, had a bath and light breakfast to refresh, and took the cab to Harish's place to pick him up. Its 9:25 am, and he had just woken up. My anger could be calmed by a punch on his sleepy face, but his innocent statement of excuse "I have a bad back ache da, so could not sleep well", calmed me faster. Mercy and Venki dropped out for their own reasons, and so did the count- 6 people.

Left Harish's place, and picked Pavi at 10:30. Pavi and I bought some medicines, just in case. Left to Div's place, picked her up and her face showed that she waitied quite long for us, and she did not like it. Anyways being the sweet girl shes always been, she cooled down in seconds.One last call to Vinay, we finally got him, and asked him to join."Ive got work", he said. We got him to call in sick, but his manager would not allow him a leave. We had to move on without him, and yeah did miss him a lot. We drove to the other end of the city to reach Girish's house to be greeted by his ferocious pet Alsation - Shishiro. While waiting for Girish and Anu to freshen up, we had some snacks his mom served and also some tips about the place from Giri's mom.

Its 12:10 we finally set forth after picking up some eatables which included Ravalgons, Rolacolas, Poppins - Pavi's choice. Four long hours spent in bangalore itself. Thats the reason I had to blog the starting.

On our way to Sivaganga, when Girish exclaimed "Hey, thats Shivaganga, the hill we are supposed to climb." It really looked huge from the highway. The weather was hot. We reached the foothills and started to trek. Girish leading the way, we followed. I took one look at the hill and said "We can do this in two hours". "Yea right! What are you? Ben Johnson?", replied Harish - 'the man of sarcasm'. "Ha ha ha, two hours ?? Do you know its around 1200 ft high. It will take around 4." added Girish. I replied confidently "I can do it in two hours." "Ok, Ill start the timer in my watch" said Girish. We started the mountain climb. A few steps and we were already sweating. None of us remembered to get the camera, as we depended on Girish's digicam, which unfortunately had no battery charger. Anyway, we did manage to click quite a few pics with the mobile cams we had. Thanks to technology!.

A few ft high, there was a stone carved Nandi seated. Shorty Pavi wanted to whisper a secret in its ear, and the Nandi's ear was alittle too high for her to reach, so she struggled but atlast managed to get hold of its ear and whispered her secret. We moved on, and instead of taking the steps, we tried the slippery rocks, when a localite screamed in pure kannada infomring us that the its too slippery as there's growth of moss due to the water trickles. We paid no heed and managed to to climb, it was much easier than the steps.

We then reached a cave temple. Bought the tickets, removed our shoes and entered in. Harish stayed back watching over the bag and shoes. There was water on floor, and its beleived there's a river flowing underneath. In the cave temple was a hole, where we could feel the water under the rocks. Its beleived that those who cannot feel the water, have sinned a lot. Girish, Anu, Div and I did manage to get to the water and poor little Pavi, her short hand never managed too. I hit my head on the rocks a couple of times, the cave was small and we had to bend our backs to avoid anymore head damage. Pavi, Divi and I also made up a cool Gandhi's three monkeys pic. We left the cave after taking the prasad. Got our shoes on and moved ahead.

It didnt seem that difficult as we thought when we had that look from the road. It wouldve been much easier, if Harish, the funny guy, didnt make us laugh every two steps. Half the energy of specially, Div and I who tugged along with Harish, was spent on laughing. It was Pavi who asked us to split, for we three were really slowing down the speed. Half the distance covered, we rested for a second time. Snapped few more pics "on the rocks", I asked Girish "How much time up, dude?" "45 minutes" he replied. Before I could say anything he added, "the second half is steeper, and would take double the time. So dont think we'll make it in two hours". Right then Harish's back gave up on him. He complained of a bad backache and could not move on. He preferred to lie down and rest half up on the hill alone, rather than accompaning us to the top, and screwing his back. A lot of cajoling and pushing went in the attempt to tug him along, but in vain, this plump rock wouldn't budge.

So we left Harish with the bag of oranges we picked upon the way, with a warning to not finish all of them. Now, just the five of us, moved on slowly, but steadily. We came to a steep flight of steps. When I say steep, I mean real steep. We held onto the railings and slowly pushed ourselves along. The view was splendiferous (beautiful in simple words). I was in the lead, and was rebuked by Pavi for stopping every few steps to take a look at the lovely landscape beneath. According to her she was losing her momentum every time I stopped, for there was place only for a single person and we had to climb in a queue.

Finally we did managed to reach the top, greeted by cool breeze blowing on our face and whispering in our ears and welcomed by huge family of monkeys. Yea, Div and Pav were so damn scared of them. We climbed to the Nandi, and tried our best to locate Harish. We gave out loud shouts and did hear him replying. He then called me and helped us locate him. I had never seen Harish this small ever before, he looked like a grain. Clicked a few more snaps and moved to the other side of the rock. The climb was worth the view. And guess what ? I won, we reached the top in exactly 2 hrs 5 minutes. (Grinn)

We rested on the rocks for some time, enjoying the picturesque beauty of nature.Pavi,Div and I,split from the love birds,giving them some space. We called Vinay up, as we did miss him a lot, but I enjoyed making him feel bad for not making to the trip and instead working. He promised he would join us for dinner, when we return back. After spending some time and trying hard to get the lyrics right of R.Kelly's "I beleive I can fly", we clicked few more pics and were ready to tread down hill.

A few steps down and the monkey family we met at the top seemed to be fascinated by us. They started to follow us!. Sounds funny?. Well, not to Pavi and Divi, they were too scared of these apes. One of them, I guess the naughtier one, moved slowly towards Pavi. Pavi froze and covering her face with her hands, she screamed at the top of her voice. Now her screams really scared all of us. "Dont scream, stay still and quiet, it will move away", I retorted. I didnt know what to do,as any wrong move and the monkey could try attacking Pavi as she was very close to it, and I didnt want that to happen. We slowly moved towards Pavi, and the monkey sensing the movement, it moved the other way. Thank Goodness! Our sweet little shorty was safe now. We moved on, the whole ape group stil accompanying us, and the already scared girls, clinging closely in a group. After a few minutes, guess the monkeys pitied the girls and stopped following.
Harish called me and due to a small misunderstanding we started a big argument. I was pissed with him and so was he. Girish and Anu, still cooing, took a different way, while Pavi, Div and I met Harish. A little more of the argument between Harish and me and then a patch up, with who's going to light the ciggarette. Stopped for a while munching oranges and listening to some mp3s on Pavi's cell.

At the foothill, we gathered at a shop for some refreshments, overlooking that the our CAB was standing right there in front of us, though Harish did spot the cab but we were not sure it was the same. We kept walking towards the entrance.. atleast half a km, the cab followed us, overtook and stopped. Realising it was our own cab, we got in with the driver saying in Kannada "Yen sir, cab marthhogbitra?" ("What sir, Did you forget the cab?"). We rode back to bangalore, all the way discussing and deciding the place for dinner, though we had planned to play truth or dare and sing songs and neither happened.

Ending the trip sweetly and hungrily, we met Vinay at Cafe Y, Langford road, Bangalore for some steaky dinner, who patiently waited for us booking a table. The menu was italian, and the dishes were tongue twisters. Though we did manage to order our choices, we couldnt recognise or make out who ordered what, when the waitress served the dishes one by one. After a lot of confusion finally things fell in their place, and the food was good. The fun aint over yet,once we served our stomachs, it was time for some maths.

We started the calculation about whos paid how much and how much more, who should pay. Confused?. It was the same for us. To start of there was no pen or paper. Borrowed a pen from the waiter and used the back of the dinner bill. A lot of calculations, miscalculations, discussions and confusions, and also entertaining the crowd seated around, we finally settled the score.

Harish left with Vinay on the bike as he would get dropped to his office,after we gave vinay one orange as a complimentary gift from us. We dropped Girish and Anu to Convergys, poor guys, had to work another night, after a tiring fun filled day. We then moved on to drop Divi and then Pavi. Both the sweet ladies, went sweeter by taking an orange each home and leaving one for me, as a memento of the trip.

I reached home, took a note of the KM reading, and bingo! It was exactly 250 Kms. Yes, 250 is the minimum Kms for any transport hire charge. Calculated the balance and bingo again, I just had the right amount. Not a penny more or less or should I say paisa. Well the second bingo was very short lived as the driver said again in Kannada "Sir, hath ghante aadhmele driver bata double". ("Sir, The driver bata doubles after 10pm"). It was close to midnight. Called Girish to confirm as I was not sure about it, and he to agreed.I didnt want to disturb my folks at home, therefore I asked the driver to take me to the nearest ATM, about 1.5 kms. After paying the driver his due, I said "Mannege hogana" ("lets go home now"), and to my surprise, he refused. He was reluctant to drop me back home. Anyway, I had paid him his due, and it was his cab, and he was sitting at the wheel, so I was quite helpless. I got down and walked back 1.5 kms. These 1.5 kms were so damn difficult then the whole 1000 odd feet of trekking. It was pitch dark, a new moon day, no company, and my legs were screaming at me to stop torturing them.

I managed to reach home, with a little energy left though not enough to hold a glass of milk which my mom wanted me to have before I sleep. Dropped my self on the bed, and drawing the sheets on me, I slept like child, with the days memories lingering in flashback in my dreams.

Goodnight!

Saturday, September 24, 2005

Say NO to Drugs !!!

I say no to drugs, but they just don't listen !


Its inviting, tempting and green,
You long for it, your eyes say it, dont deny.
Haha havent realised, youve made this shit a routine.
I know it, once more, you wanna get on a high.

I see you trading with that peddler,
Green notes for some green leaves.
With a king sized pack of Rizla.
Jammin up with ya stoned buddies.


Throw the seeds, Mix the stuff,
Lay the rizla neat, roll up the weed.
Some call it weed, some pot and some ganja,
Whatever the name, dont you just love marijuana.


Roll roll roll your joint,
Twist it up at the end.
Spark it up take a draw,
Pass it to your friend.

Stoners live, and stoners die,
but in the end they all get high,
So if at first you don't succeed,
Screw it all and smoke some Weed

Skin a rizla or a fill up the chillum
In the end to its illusions you succumb
Top it up with some sweet,
You feel the kick take you so neat.


Blast the music, yea its loads of trance,
Numbness in your feet, your head starts to dance.
You need to fly, damn, you've got no wings.
Laughing away, you love the pleasure it brings

Smoke the trees, get stoned on the joint,
Not alone, pass it down the line,
Enjoy the kick. If you scare yourself,
It will blow your ****** mind

Thursday, August 25, 2005

Blog the Anniversary !

August 25, 2004 :

I received a mail from Nirupesh, who wrote that he has started blogging and gave the link to his blog, named "the root". I had a meek idea about blogging, but was completely new to it. After some time I received another mail from Harish, who followed through and created his own blog, named " the lone wolf". Now this instilled some curiosity in me, and when I get curious.. hmm !!

I went through their blogs or so called web logs or web journals, and it was quite interesting and a neat way to use your writing skills and more importantly share your thoughts and opinions and let others know about you. All who knew me well, used to say that I do have good writing skills, but I as usual walked over it. I used to write a little poetry and a diary but never maintained them. I thought to myself "well, why dont I too start a blog and write on the web instead", and then was born a blog.

August 25, 2005 :

A blog that is loved by few, criticised by few and ignored by few (They find it boring!) A blog that changed its look and appearance every now and then, from a white background of a harbor to black one with a quill. From the normal standard blogger template to the now modernised fixed lakeside background. Though Ive seen far superior blogs in terms of look and far better writings and content too, I would still like to say my blog has earned what it had to.

If I look back on my blogging days, I can say, in this one year, Ive learnt a lot through blogging, my thinking has become stronger and better, it has helped me understand things clearer, as almost all of these posts are inspired and talk about anything that I have seen and observed, stuff that has happened to me, to my friends, to my closed ones. Every post has a story behind it which is in no way fictional. I thank all the people involved who encouraged, criticised and most importantly read my blog and commented on it.

To cut the long story short, I wish my blog a happy anniversary.

Thursday, July 21, 2005

Dream on

*The dream is real, my friends. The failure to realize it is the only reality. --Toni Cade Bambara

I slept with Dream - all through the night,
She n I had a lovely time, till break of dawn
My eyes searched for her - she was outta sight.
Miss Reality laughed and said "Dude, shes gone."
I got dressed and left to look for Dream,
I searched hard and looked far,
An easy task it did not seem.
Planing my next move, I sat in a cafe nearby,
The thought of finding my Dream, I felt lost.
Then the doors opened, and entered Despair,
He got a double espresso and sat before me.
I asked if he saw Dream, his look did scare.
"She probably aint coming back, kid", he laughed at me.
With that he left, and I called on Solace's number,
Tears welled, when I knew, I could'nt reach her.
With two shots of tequila, I left for my villa,
Saw Hope at my door, saying "Cry no more".
Smiled and asked "Why are you here ?"
She hugged me and said "You need me, dear."
"Thats your life" pointing to Reality, she then said.
"But dont stop chasing your dream", she took me to bed.
In yearn for my Dream, I was losing morality,
She whispered,
"Have me, have Hope, Ill turn your dream to Reality."

Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Overwhelmed !!!

You were born an original. Don't die a copy. - John Mason

A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun, enjoy the trip!

June 11, 2005 :
I was all involved in the daily humdrum, and the day-to-day tasks that I had almost forgotten my own birthday. It was the day before and I had no clue that my birthday was the very next day untill Harish my best bud, took me out the very same evening, on pretext of some work of his, to RR, where well .. Surprise !!! Yup there was a surprise dinner party arranged an all, and how happy and special I felt, when I saw two of my closest and sweetest friends, Divi and Pavi, who were present there after a hard days work to celebrate my bday. I just felt happier when Girish and Neel joined us later. After all that fun, they stayed awake till 12am to call and wish me at the start of my bday.. and well, another surprise was Bidisha who called me all the way from Pune.

June 12, 2005 :
I slept happily waiting for my bday to dawn, and hey I was woken up by another phone call wish, it was Deepa, my college friend, who has never missed to call me be it any occasion, bday, festivals, friendship day etc etc, since seven years. She's always been my support come what may all through these seven years. Well, the calls kept comin in all through the day -Naveen, Harsha, college friends etc. Spent the morning at my sis's school for some inaugration and was wearing the shirt Divv gifted me. Though I was showered with wishes from the bestest of my friends, I still expected a few people to wish me, and just then Harish called me again and informed theres somethin urgent and we need to go, and soon after Jayasree too called me and wanted to meet me . I assumed there must be another surprise comin up, and as we were about to leave the phone rang and it was Deeps, my s'h'weet best friend who with Annie had actually planned another big surprise party for me, I was on cloud 9.Well later in the night had dinner out with family and retired to bed.

June 15, 2005 :
I started writing this blog in the morning of June 13,2005 its a couple of days and am still writing. Harish came online a few minutes back and I informed him "Dude, Im trying to write my blog about my birthday, and am unable to get words or frame sentences." "hmm, overwhelmed ?? " he replied. Hes right, as two days later, I still did get calls and mails of belated bday.... Bindhu,Vinay, Karma, Supriya, Sam,Vani n all.

I thank the Almighty, for gifting me with this wonderful bunch of friends.

Friday, May 27, 2005

Jammed...

I am not afraid of storms for I am learning how to sail my ship. - Louisa May Alcott.

Post - heavy lunch, sipping on a hot cup of tea, I was standing at the door of my house astonishingly glaring at that windstorm speeding away which is so uncommon in this part of the world. Minutes later, skies roared, letting go of humongous amount of rainfall accompanied by hailstones in sizes upto a ping pong ball.. The sight of the storm trio - Wind, rain and hailstones - was worth a view. I had just started enjoying this form of the weather, when there was a loud beep. Standing with the now empty tea cup, inside the cosy warm veranda of the house, I glanced across the portico blinded by the stormin rain and in a blurred vision I realised that the beep was from my cab waiting to pick me up and drop me to office. A quick glance at my watch, it was 4:05 pm. I put on my shoes and jacket and dashed my way to the cab. I got in, but drenched, drenched in just a few seconds.

"Lets wait for the weather to calm down"
"No" said the cab driver, "We will be late"
"The city is flooded, roads will be blocked and trees will be uprooted. Its better we wait for some time", I insisted.

Turning a deaf ear, he started the cab, and less than a mile, we were witnessing the havoc. The main road was flooded with knee deep water. Vehicles hesitating to drive through, we turned around and took another way, a few miles and the sights of trees uprooted, branches fallen on the roads, was quite expected. We were somewhere in Fraser town, all roads were inaccessible. Thirty minutes of driving around we finally found a way out, a small gulli leading to the other end of the flooded roads, though it was difficult driving through the narrow, congested lane we were releived that atleast we got through one part of the blocked city but that was shortlived too. We reached near Ulsoor Lake at the junction just before NAGA cinema and to our dismay the traffic snarls and road blocks were more atrocious than before.

We had just travelled about 4 miles from home, and the clock read 5:00 pm. One hour and only 4 miles done, this was the start of exhaustion. The driver now a little experienced, opted not to get packed in the traffic jam, and drove straight to the road adjacent of the lake which leads to RBANMS college, assuming it would be clear of traffic. Yes it was indeed, but just a small stretch as the vehicles before us were returning back, and one of the passengers in them was courteous enough to inform us that a huge tree has been completely uprooted blocking the road. Ardously, my driver, turned the cab and was just about to move, when a crackin noise alarmed all of us. This time it was a huge branch that fell across, trapping us in between. A tree behind, a branch in front, the lake on the right, and buildings to the left, we surely were sandwiched.

No worries, this is a city of lanes. There was a lone lane, between those buildings which opened its arms like a saviour.With no choice left, we drove into it, along the curvy lane and protruding houses, we finally came to the main road.At this moment, I couldnt help but laugh. We were back at the same junction before NAGA cinema with the traffic jam now even larger and still growing.Though the rain had stopped, and weather calmed down, it left the city in complete chaos with the havoc it created. Now we had no choce but to move at snail speed in the jam. I turned up the stereo volume, expecting some soothing music to the rescue.

"Enjoy the beautiful Bangalore weather !", echoed Darius, the RJ. Yea right !
"Its exactly 5:45, this is radio city time check and you are listening to Darius" .
Woah ! Its been almost a couple of hours and just 4 miles !!! It was frustrating and I had a serious thought to walk up the rest of the way, when the driver gave a helpless look at me.
"Well, I thought we wouldn't be late" I thought sarcastically at the back of my mind while returning his look.
"We should've waited for some time, atleast we wouldnt have spent time stuck in traffic.", he told me with a 'I shouldve listened to you' kinda tone.

I lit a smoke up, and relaxed as we inched through the jam-packed city, enjoying the svelte, gratifying music. At this moment I had indeed started enjoying the weather. We moved on slowly, passing through the hub of Bangalore city, namely the brigades and MGs. This was one of the rare occasions were brigade road was very less crowded of pedestrians and window shoppers. How i wished it would be the same on all weekends. Just recovering from previous traffic jams, we bump into another near shoolay circle, and another on richmond road. Overheard that a heavy branch had fallen on a transformer nearby, damaging it and blacking out the area.

We had just had enough when a kinda bumping noise from behind prompted the driver to stop the cab, put on the handbrake, and get out. Seconds later, a verbally abusive argument was on between the autorickshaw driver and my cab driver, causing another jam and more of noisy, ear-aching beeps of vehicles behind. For once our cab was the cause of another jam. Once being satisfied at throwing verbal insults, the cab driver moved on, still cribbing.

It was 7 p.m, we still had 5 miles to go and many more blocks. At this point the city seemed a complete choc-a-block. We reached KH road, to greet the next jam, when one of the pedestrians informed us that a car was crushed under a tree, injuring a lady, prompting the cops to divert all traffic away. We crawled through the diversion and took a whole circle of Lalbagh gardens, till we finally neared Jayanagar. A couple more miles, and a burning pungent smell attracting our noses emerged, it stayed with us fo a long while, confirming that it was from our cab. Tried our best to find out the source of it, but in vain.

"It could be the tyres", I said to the driver.
"Maybe some rubber is burning in the heated engine", he replied.
"Could be", I shuddered. We moved on and atlast reached office at JP nagar, with the fallen branches and flooded roads sight still before our eyes around the office building. I got out, and stretched my tired body and bones, which were in a similiar position for four and a half hours. Yes, it was half past eight in the night. A journey that usually takes 45 minutes, took four and half hours. Phew !

Most of you may have experienced the same sort of situation today, but somehow I felt I got to blog this as I have never been in a vehicle continously for four hours without getting out to even stretch my legs even on a long journey out of city, and this was within city limits in the middle of the chaotic, insensible traffic of loving Bangalore.

Its nearing dawn of next day and I need to get back in the cab in a few minutes as i close work for the day, though I did work an extra four hours to make up for the loss, im happy it gave time for me to blog my experience in between work. (Well yes, I do this between work and if u need to know how, then that would need another post, and Im tired )

Goodnight !

Friday, May 13, 2005

Friday the 13th ...!

Paraskevi - Friday Dekatria - Thirteen Phobia - Fear
TGIF - Thank God Its Friday !

Fear of Friday the 13th ..or paraskevidekatriaphobia ( .. trying to pronounce? ..lol.. my tongue hurts) in Greek . Friday the 6th day of week and the number 13 together gave birth to this widespread superstition. The most dreaded day .. atleast in some parts of the globe. Ironically the land where I live in doesnt really give much importance to this superstition, though its the land of highest superstitions.. lol. Do u know the history of this superstition ? Well neither did I until i saw another blog describing pages about it ..LMAO .. huh! ..what sad stuff to blog about ..

Contrary .. I love fridays ... For many reasons,
- last day of week
- welcoming a weekend of fun, leisure and a lot of sleep .. snoooooozzzze
- lovely, delicious food cooked by mom every friday.
- friday prayers makes me feel I have a angelic halo on my head (atleats for a couple of hours .. ;-))
- and also fridays welcome a lot of movies ..
- and lastly I just love to say

TGIF !!!!

Er%=?!!??!.. w:hats=+ h)ppni*-ng ?!? My k{e:y;bor-ds acting we+i*rd. Is it bcoz its Fri*d=y da thirrrrrthennnnth >>> ..
No ..ders $om<- pi#ces of ch@c^late stu!!ck under da ke!~ys .. tim~e to clea*n da ke}y~boa=rd.

Wednesday, April 13, 2005

Ignorance is bliss !

Ignorance is bliss - Thomas Gray
Ignorance is the seed to intimidation - D. Hiser


Very well said "Ignorance is bliss ! " ... but bliss for whom ? the one who ignores or one who is ignored. Probably its just situational.

Ignorance is truely bliss, when we ignore our troubles, our pain, though not for long, but surely gives time and space to sort things out and make them straight. Truely said "Ignorance is bliss".

Now, there are also times when we are caught up with our troubles, and when we look around, we find ourselves ignored. Ignored by all, ignored by our ownself, ignored by life. Its at this time when the whole world around us looks blissful and happy, but we feel we are deprived of it and they say "Ignorance is bliss" ?

But at times we want to share our sorrows and problems with our loved ones, but when we try, we see how happy and blissful they are at the moment, and do not feel like stealing it away from them , to sooth our pain selfishly, so we ignore our pain for their bliss. Yes, truely said "Ignorance is bliss".

At times our heart and mind play an interesting game, one tries to control the other and the other tries to rule out its desire. We have a strong urge to express our feelings, vocalise our hearts desire, but then hold back as the fear of a negative consequence is stronger, we tend to ignore our feelings, suppress the desire, and happily let things be the way they are. Hmm truely said " Ignorance is bliss !"

Contrary, we never get to express what we want to say, never let them know what we feel, we ignore our innerself, to later regret, that ' if I had expressed myself things could have been different'. We sulk on our ignorance, and its said "Ignorance is bliss"

When loneliness engulfs, we tend to feel ignored and unasked. To overcome the darkness we try to get more attention than normal, more affection than normal, thereby asking for more, craving for that little space and comfort of togetherness, wanting a shoulder to rest our head on. We are unhappy that we are ignored, and they say "Ignorance is bliss" ?

Ironically when we have everyone around us, with us, for us, we would like be alone away from all, seeking happiness and content in solitude, we ignore all and want to be ignored by all, well then, truely said " Ignorance is bliss".

As I said before, its purely situational, therefore if the above words do not make any sense to you, you may ignore it, for I say "Ignorance is bliss !".

Friday, March 18, 2005

Tempted.. give in or refrain ?

Curiosity kills the cat the say but its the temptations of the grey shade that poisons your life.
"Lets try some puffs" said one of my friends in school as he drew the paper rolled tobacco out of the pocket of his shirt, which was supposed to carry chocolates or gum. I looked at it with eyes open wide and said "I have heard its injurious, and leads to cancer". He laughed out loud saying "Cmon, its just one cigarette!". Crouched under the stairway, away from the sights of the teachers, curiosity twinkled in the innocent eyes of a couple of 10 year olds.

As I lit my first cigarette, and took a slow drag on the smoke, I choked and coughed it all up. I could feel the fire in my chest and the windpipe seemed like a chimney, tears rolled down those chubby cheeks, as the smoke burnt that curiosity that twinkled innocently a few seconds ago. My first time and I sweared I'd never touch that damn thing again - the end of curiosity.

Years passed, and entered high school, and got the first tag of being a senior to a number of kiddos, yeah, at the age of 15 you no longer are a kid, or rather hate to be called as one. One of the easiest way to prove it was to smoke stylishly, and get in sync with the so called grown-ups who puffed every other minute. From curiosity to style, it was just a harmless act of imitation, but unfortunately a stairway to the dreaded prison of death.

A couple more years, and in the freedom of the hip and cool college era, exposed to the vulnerabilites of the world of desires and temptations, beautifully decorated to attract the "frog-out-of-the-well" college goers just out of school. I lit that damn thing again, but after this it was not going to be the same, as I dragged on it, and blew the first puff of smoke, my colleague had a strange look on his face for a second, and then a hearty laugh which lasted a minute.

I was puzzled, till he asked me, "hey ! dont you take the smoke inside ?". Before I could think of an answer, he said " You dont know how to smoke, cmon pull the smoke into your lungs", and to help me do that better, he asked me to klench my nose between my fingers, while dragging the smoke and retain it in my lungs for a few seconds, and the result ... the smoke gushed out choking all my breathing equipment, I coughed and tears welled up in my eyes as my colleague had a hearty laugh again, this time longer ending with a question " How did it feel ?". I was high on a single puff, my head was heavy and swaying encouraging nausea to take control. I felt terrible, regrettung for another time, telling myself "I should have refrained !", and later pacifying my inner conscious that I was just curious of how it feels when u "really" smoke.

Hmm, you know something, I started to write this post after I decided to quit smoking so that it would remind me of how bad was I influenced, but the damn paper rolled tobacco stick, is sitting firmly between my lips waiting to be lit as I end this post.

Yea, gave in to the temptation again for the umpteenth time. Did I hear you laugh on my foolishness ? - am not surprised, kind of used to this laughter !

Monday, February 14, 2005

Mushed up !!!

* "Love those who hate you, but do not hurt those who love you"

I -
- dedicate this post to wish the best for all my friends in love with that someone special-
- dedicate to all my friends knotted for life -
- dedicate to my friends who aren't sure -
- and to all those who still waiting for that special one -

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dawn 2 Dusk.

As the day dawns on my unslept eyes,
Staring in the golden skies,
I lose myself deep in questions of my mind,
Tryin to throw, on my complicated heart some light,
Time seems to stand still, its neither day nor night.

Just good friends, we still are
Too close, but yet so far,
Friendship never ends, but it does grow
Into a lot more,
But at times stays at "just good friends",
- and nothing more.

I went against what my head was saying,
And followed my heart through,
I tried the best to quit, maybe was ahead,
Am I falling in love with you ?
My hearts complicated, my mind doesnt tell me,
If I should smile because your my friend or cry because thats all you will ever be.

I feel low, I dunno why,
Being your best friend takes me on a high.
For that smile of yours,
The friendship of ours,
I beg my heart to kill this urge inside.

Now -
I'll go with what my head is saying,
and will follow not my heart through,
I know I cant quit, although I am ahead,
My friend - Ill still be there for you.
My hearts complicated, my mind doesnt tell me,
If I should smile because your my friend or cry because thats all you will ever be.

I wish to leave unanswered, all those questions of my mind,
For I know its not easy, in the diminishing light.
Time really seemed still, as its neither day nor night,
As the dusk sets on my unslept eyes,
Staring in the golden skies.

--- mithss

Saturday, February 05, 2005

Smoke it sweet !

Smokin Sweeeeeeeet..

Its all dark out there, ther aint no ray of hope ..
a dangerous land, temptin to make u dope.
every step ya take, each move ya make,
In here thers never a mistake.
Rollin da smoke, smokin da weed,
flyinn away in colours , after smoke n sweet.
lost in da mind, swingin so fine ,

njoying yea, not knowing when your life gonna lay still
smokin to chill., each other we kill, the emptiness we fill,
njoying yea, not knowing when your life gonna lay still,

yo yo yeaa Its a gangsta world out ther
aint nuttin but a dangerous land yea

jus a tweny three old, not sure of tweny four,
strollin along chest up, son of a gun u still roar.
king off da baddies, a wannabe,
no kidding this, stop freakin n better see,
getta my ring on, and the mettal chain on ,
rolling a smoke on, yea, like a don
kickin up some ass, freakin on some lass,

njoying yea, not knowing when your life gonna lay still
smokin to chill., eachother we kill, the emptiness we fill,
njoying yea, not knowing when your life gonna lay still,

yo yo yeaa Its a gangsta world out ther
aint nuttin but a dangerous land yea
smokin sweet, yea rolled out neat
rollling it neat, so betta - smoke it sweet.

Thursday, January 27, 2005

Bole tho !



Click here for the Pics
Picture 1
Picture 2

Apun ka raj chaltha hai
Bole tho sab apun se dartha hai
Bhai hai apun akka area ka
aur hero saare choriyon ka
Bole tho apun mein smile bhi hai , Isshthyle bhi,
Maamu log mein apun ka record bhi ..
kabhi koi mach mach hui tho,
apun ka bheja ubaltha hai,
aur bas kissi ki waat lagake, fineesh
oye aankhe phaad ke kya padhrela hai
Upar dekh, mushy bhai ka photoo lagela hai.
Akhal watak gayi kya ? .. dimaag mat lagaa ,
Bole tho Munnabhai agar doctor banrela
Tho apun socha apun computer sikhlega.. Posted by Hello

Tuesday, January 25, 2005

Nostalgia . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

A nice weekend , though spent most of it at home , it was very relaxing and thought provoking , or may be rather the best way to describe it would be " it was nostalgic " ..
... I had been to a close friends house, whom i have known for 6 years,and has been a great support in my life !!! I met her in person after a couple or more months. As we conversed we started digging out the past that was buried deep with all the responsibilities, the present, the new environment, the plans for the future.

...Though the conversation lasted for just an hour or so , it triggered memories that lingered in my thoughts throughout the weekend and provoking the arena of nostalgia. I looked back , and saw all those days flash by, like flipping an old photograph album. The days, when we thought we would stay in touch forever, the days when we thought that we would still have time for our friends come what may..

...But then when the album finished, reality shone bright in the present. I havent met half of them in years, have heard last of a few a long time back. Have seen a few in recent times... but still .. a wish arose in me, drowned in my eyes filled with salty water, .. " I wish I could stay in touch all along with these people some who were and some who are my friends..."

.... Though i knew that the wish being fulfilled is a distant reality, i jus prayed that those who lost touch with a painful end, would someday appear before me, so that we have a chance to drive away that pain and heal the wound, so that it hurts not, when memories dig them out.

Thursday, January 13, 2005

Zooom with Dhoom


Harish & I on our Fast and Furious Black Pulsar on the way to Nandi Hills. Far behind Vinay and rest in the car and in front (not visible) Girish and family taking the pic. ZZZzzzzzzzooooommmm .......... Posted by Hello